Category Archives: Won Cannes

These film’s did it! Good job!

Movie Review: Slice and Dice: The Slasher Film Forever (2012, Dir. Calum Waddell)

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Slice and Dice: The Slasher Film Forever

I learned of High Rising Productions, the company that created Slice and Dice, through the work that they did producing extras for Arrow Video’s DVD and Blu-ray releases.  Before High Rising Productions made extras a lot of UK horror releases either didn’t have them, or claimed an interactive menu was an extra feature.

The first High Rising Production extra I saw featured cast interviews, the thoughts of the director, and was made for a much more interesting viewing experience.  To the point where, if some of their short documentaries like ‘From Romero to Rome’ had been longer, perhaps they could have been stand alone features.

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Movie Review: Kill Me Now (2012, Dir. Travis Long)

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Kill Me Now

Before discussing Kill Me Now, I must state that I am a pretty big fan of Cracked.com. This film was written by and stars Cracked.com columnist Michael Swaim (After Hours, Agents of Cracked). There are bit roles for Cracked.com regulars Katy Stoll (Those Aren’t Muskets) and Katie Wilbert (After Hours), and there is a cameo near the end by Daniel O’Brien (Those Aren’t Muskets, After Hours). Most of the people that write regularly at Cracked.com are thanked in the credits, all having some small role in helping some way.

I mention this because I cannot imagine anyone who isn’t a fan of Cracked enjoying this film. It is very much in their style, and although directed by Travis Long, it is truly Michael Swaim’s film. For those that like things in Cracked’s unique style, this is a very, very, very good thing.

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Movie Review: Antiviral (2012, Dir. Brandon Cronenberg)

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Antiviral

Cronenberg. This is a name all film junkies should know. David Cronenberg has directed horror classics such as Videodrome and The Fly, period pieces like A Dangerous Method, masterpieces like Eastern Promises, and underrated gems such as Cosmopolis. He is known for his cold and disconnected style, mixed in with a certain amount of surrealist horror and general oddness.

Does the name Brandon Cronenberg ring any bells? He should. He is the son of David (heh) and a new director. After years of nearly every art form but film, he finally gave in and tried it out with Antiviral. Having premiered at the 2012 Cannes Film Festival, it has just now been released in limited theaters and Video On Demand.

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Movie Review: CLONED: The Recreator Chronicles (2012, Dir. Gregory Orr)

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Cloned: The Recreator Chronicles

CLONED: The Recreator Chronicles is fucking brilliant. In fact, I only have two legitimate complaints about the film, and both stayed inside of Stella Maeve’s shirt the entire time. I appreciated the candor of this film, especially after being so let down by the spoon-fed dreck and insulting nature of the Evil Dead remake. Also, towards the end, there is a scene with a guy kissing his own clone, which I’m sure would cause any fine Christian to not know whether to spit or go blind. What with, not only the man-on-man action, but the whole immorality of cloning, blah blah, suck my satanic prick, issue. This film gets an A+ and extra fucking credit.

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Movie Review: Iron Man 3 (2013, Dir. Shane Black)

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iron man 3

Last year, after Joss Whedon’s The Avengers received critical attention, people everywhere wondered how the series was going to transition back to stand alone movies. Out of all the characters from The Avengers, Robert Downey Jr.’s character of Iron Man is by far the most popular, as can be seen in the box office numbers. Iron Man and Iron Man 2 brought in $585 million and $624 million respectively, nearly twice any of the other stand-alone films in the Marvel Cinematic Universe.

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Tribeca Film Fest 2013: Prince Avalanche (2013, Dir. David Gordon Green)

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prince-avalanche_tribeca_2013_you-won-cannes

I remember how I felt when I saw David Gordon Green’s All The Real Girls in theaters. At that point in my life, I was quite young, and I’d watch anything at the only arthouse theater in my town. Movies would pop up there, screen for a week, and vanish forever. I remember very little of the film itself, but there are remnants of the visuals left in my synapses; the warm organic closeness, and I recall my reactions. I know I was captivated, but I knew nothing massive was happening. I felt I should be bored, but I wasn’t.

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Movie Review: Pain & Gain (2013, Dir. Michael Bay)

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Pain & Gain

If I had to characterize a Michael Bay film, I would say explosions. Why? Because “BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM” is all one hears and fiery metallic limbs are all one sees during one of his movies. Want proof? Watch this video.

Did you see the BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOM BOOMs? Thought so. I mention this Bayacteristic to emphasize how un-Baylike Pain & Gain is. Want to know the number of explosions I can remember from the film? One, and it is not exactly a massive one. Most of Bay’s films are stereotypical action flicks with little to no plot and loads of explosions. This one is not like the others. I reiterate for emphasis: this one is not like the others.

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Tribeca Film Fest 2013: Tricked (2012, Dir. Paul Verhoeven)

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Tricked

I’m illiterate. That’s right. Even this article was translated from doo-doo smears I left on paper for our co-editior, Madeleine. This is most likely why I didn’t know who Paul Verhoeven was. Why I haven’t seen Robocop, or Basic Instinct (let’s also pretend that illiteracy prevents the viewing of certain situationally convenient movies), or most of his other films. I may have seen Total Recall, but that idea is based off a vague memory of Schwarzenegger’s head exploding on mars. Was that in that movie? Whatever. I digress.

Not knowing who he was, I was attracted to Tricked because of its concept – crowdsourcing. I liked the idea of a community made, democratically collaborative film, and thought I’d give it a shot. And it did not disappoint.

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Movie Review: Errors of the Human Body (2012, Dir. Eron Sheean)

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Errors Of The Human Body 2012Errors Of The Human Body 2012

Late last night I sat down with my third or fourth glass of wine to watch Errors of the Human Body. The trailer had painted the film as a slow-burn sci-fi, heavy on visuals, and I anticipated it would be sparse on plot. I figured a little inebriation would be a nice complement to my viewing experience. Yet, as the film played on, I experienced a mixture of enthrallment and frustration as I focused as hard as I could not to miss a thing. There was so much more happening than I had expected and, if I wasn’t mistaken, it was all wonderful. It ended, and I retired to bed. Immediately upon waking this morning, I rushed back to my television and pressed play again, now sober and fully alert. I needed to be sure. And I was right: this movie is awesome.

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Blu-ray Review: John Dies At The End (2012, Dir. Don Coscarelli)

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John Dies At The End

Common sense states I should be under duress right now, but I’m not. I’m feeling too “zen-like.” Common sense also states that what you’re reading should be a review about a movie Don Coscarelli directed titled John Dies At The End, based on the book of the same name, penned by some dude with the pseudonym of David Wong, but you better throw that notion out the window right fuckin’ now.

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